Dear Johan,
We need you tonight. We know you’re pitching against a dangerous line up in Milwaukee. We know that you haven’t been your Ace-self in the last few starts. We know you’re not going to get anything resembling run support. We know the team will probably make an error or two behind you. You know it too. Here’s the thing Johan, we still need you to win tonight.
You are the stopper. You are the one that puts an end to a four game skid, and gets the team back to .500 so we can again say we have a better record than teams like the Reds. It’s embarrassing to the organization and the fans to have a record below .500 in the worst division in baseball. That’s right, the worst. The Phillies have the worst record of any first place team, and the Nationals have the worst record period. Please help the team get back on track.
While you’re at it, give Jose a deep tissue massage in his hamstring, put a bandaid on Carlos’s knee, and check to make sure David is putting the right contact lenses in.
Always,
Disgruntled Mets fan.
Couldn’t have said it better myself!
minaya’s mets stink worse than a bin full of soiled diapers left in a small, stuffy, heated, storage closet, whose floor is already strewn with dead rats and moldy, rancid horse meat smoked with diesel exhaust.